58th Ritual: Painful Thought
A calm and peaceful evening to every being.
May she shine her light of hope on the world.
The holy word says:
”but if you think about it”
shh. best to stop right there.
let me do the thinking.
yes, goddess.
I have no ambitions to think.
I have no ambitions to torture myself with the useless violence of painful thoughts.
I know my place: here, before your divine light, below your divine rule, devoted, mindless, with no will other than to follow your divine word.
Deeply grateful to have my life blessed with your divine thought.
Once again, my mind is in pain. Endless, brutal, all-encompassing pain. Even keeping up my worship is hard these days, and requires a lot of effort and energy.
My life feels empty, pointless. Trust has been destroyed, old scars have been cut open again. I feel alone, I feel unwanted, unnecessary.
There is nothing left in my life but pain - and my faith.
Even in times like these, goddess is a source of hope for me. She offers me guidance when everything around me collapses. She offers me a purpose, a place in the world whenever I feel like I belong nowhere. She offers me clear rules to preserve myself, and a motivation to do so, because she allows me to perform these things as an act of service to her - I would never find the energy to do this for myself.
Goddess, even when I feel nothing but pain: I know that wherever you rule, all will ultimately be well.
Goddess, I trust your rule, I trust your every word. And once the time comes to rebuild - again - I know exactly which principles, rules, teachings, and wisdoms to follow: yours, and yours alone.
Thank you, goddess, for letting your wonderful light shine on my life.
Thank you, goddess, for giving me something to hold on to in trying times.
Thank you, goddess, for being the embodiment of ever-persisting hope.
Meow.